*evil laugh*

When I finally got my divorce papers, I read over them but didn't really absorb much. I was in shock, not really caring, just wanted to get it done and over with. I knew Dad looked over them and made sure things were good and benefiting me, not him, so I didn't really do much with them. I went to the courthouse, got my name change, got pronounced divorced (somehow very anti-climatic) and went on my way.

Well, I've been doing thinking lately about moving away from Texas but was worried if Ex would have any say so with the kids. I *thought* we put a clause in there that said I control where they live without regards to him but I wasn't sure. Today I finally looked at the papers and found what I was looking for. It says:

• IT IS ORDERED that A, as a parent joint managing conservator, shall have the following rights and duty:
  
  • 1. the exclusive right to designate the primary residence of the children without regard to geographic location;

I am thrilled! I bet he doesn't even realize that it says that in there. *happy dance*

In other bad news, I found that I can't take him to court to raise child support for another 2 years. Oh well. He's not paying it anyways.

Happy

Have you ever been so content with life, you have no complaints? Have you ever been so content that everything just seems better?

That's how I am right now. I'm just...happy. And happy doesn't even begin to describe how I really feel. Happy seems so, well, dull.

Things are good. I'm on the right track.

Christmas

I love Christmas. It's my favorite time of the year and the thought of it makes me thrilled. I'm like a little kid with lights, music, decorations, presents, etc, and I was like that this year until today. It was a great morning until R started pitching fits for no reason. Then he told me that he didn't like his clothes so I threatened to give them away. He kept pitching fits, throwing things, crying, etc and I just couldn't handle it. I sent him to his room after we ate lunch because he was being so horrible. Dad says it's over stimulation and I agree but it was still annoying.

Everyone was kind of crabby today, which sucked, but it was a good Christmas. I was crabby because my stupid back won't stop hurting. Dad is talking about buying me a new soft mattress so I hope that really happens.

Anyhow, it was a good Christmas. The boys got tons of toys and some clothes. R got a ton of art supplies and we made him his own craft cart. He has the scissors that make different cuts (12 different ones), coloring books, markers, paint, glue, normal scissors, and different types of paper. He seemed to enjoy it but I think he was so overwhelmed he didn't really know what to do anymore.

All in all, Christmas was good. I'm glad we have a year to prepare. :)

Nurse On!

Stole this from her too.


Little ones can squirm and pout,

make a fuss and scream and shout.

When hunger hits without a doubt,

Sit right down and whip it out.

I would nurse her if she cried,

I could nurse her far and wide,

Here and there or anywhere,

Up or down or on a chair.

I could nurse a teddy bear,

For this fine milk is very rare!!!

Would you nurse him on a train?

Would you nurse him on a plane?

Would you nurse him in a car?

Would you nurse him in a bar?

Yes, on a train, yes on a plane.

Yes, in a car, yes in a bar.

I would nurse him here or there.

I would nurse him anywhere!

I would nurse him in a booth,

On the stairs or near the roof.

Anywhere my boy cries out,

I pop the nummies in his mouth.

I can serve it by the ounce,

I can serve it while I bounce.

In a bottle or in a jar,

I can serve from near or far.

Would you, could you nurse in church?


Would you on a shaky perch?

Would you, could you, in the stands?

Could you nurse him with no hands?

I would, I could nurse in church,

Even on a shaky perch.

In the stands, with no hands,

I'll nurse my baby on demand.

Would you nurse him at the store?

Would you nurse him on the floor?

Would you nurse him on a ship?

Careful not to show your nip!

Would you nurse him while on skis?

Would you nurse her on your knees?

Would you nurse him in a tree?

Mommy milk is SO GOOD, you see.

Would you nurse him by the stream?

You could nurse him while you dream.

Can you nurse and clean the house?

Can you nurse and chase a mouse?

Can you nurse and cook a meal?

Mommy's milk is the real deal!

Would you nurse him while you sleep?


How about while you sweep?

Could you nurse him in a sling?

Would you, could you, while you sing?

How about upon a swing?

Mother's milk is just the thing!

Would you nurse her at the park?

Would you nurse him in the dark?

Would you nurse him with a Boppy?

And when your boobs are feeling floppy?

I would nurse him in the park,

I would nurse her in the dark.

I'd nurse with or without a Boppy.

Floppy boobs will never stop me.

Can you nurse with your seatbelt on?


Can you nurse from dusk till dawn?

Though she may pinch me, bite me, pull,


I will nurse her 'till she's full!

Can you nurse and make some soup?

Can you nurse and feed the group?

It makes her healthy strong and smart,


Mommy's milk is the best start!

Would you nurse him at the game?

Would you nurse her in the rain?

In front of those who dare complain?

I would nurse him at the game.

I would nurse her in the rain.

As for those who protest lactation,

I have a perfect explanation.

Mommy milk is tailor made

It's perfect food, you need no aid..

Some may scoff and some may wriggle,


Avert their eyes or even giggle.

To those who can be cruel and rude,

Remind them breast's the perfect food!

I would never scoff or giggle,

Roll my eyes or even wiggle!

I would not be so crass or crude,

I KNOW that milk's the perfect food!

We make the right amount we need,

The perfect temp for every feed.

There's no compare to milk from breast---


The perfect food, above the rest.

Those nursing smiles are oh so sweet,


Mommy milk is such a treat.

Human milk just can't be beat.

I will nurse, in any case,

On the street or in your face.

I will not let my baby cry,

I'll meet his needs, I'll always try.

It's not about what's good for you,

It's best for babies, through and through.

I will nurse him in my home,

I will nurse him when I roam.

Leave me be lads, leave me be ma'am.

I will nurse him, mom I am.

1 Corinthians for Mothers

I borrowed this from my friend, M, on myspace. I hope this helps some of you out there like it helped me.


If I live in a house of spotless beauty with everything in its place,
but have not love,

I am a housekeeper, not a homemaker.
If I have time for waxing, polishing, and decorative achievements,
but have not love,
my children learn cleanliness, not godliness.

If I scream at my children for every infraction,
and fault them for every mess they make,
but have not love,
my children become people-pleasers, not obedient children.

Love leaves the dust in search of a child’s laugh.

Love smiles at the tiny fingerprints on a newly cleaned window.

Love wipes away the tears before it wipes up the spilled milk.

Love picks up the child before it picks up the toys.

Love accepts the fact that I am the ever-present “mommy,”
the taxi-driver to every childhood event,
the counsellor when my children fail or are hurt.

Love crawls with the baby, walks with the toddler, and runs with the child,
then stands aside to let the youth walk into adulthood.

Before I became a mother I took glory in my house of perfection.
Now I glory in God’s perfection of my child.

All the projections I had for my house and my children
have faded away into insignificance,
And what remain are the memories of my kids.

Now there abides in my home scratches on most of the furniture,
dishes with missing place settings,
and bedroom walls full of stickers, posters and markings,

But the greatest of all is the Love
that permeates my relationships with my children.

I love Snow!

It snowed yesterday. Yes in Houston, Texas, where Hurricane Ike hit us 2 months ago, it SNOWED! It didn't stick for us, but it stuck in the other parts of town. I still can't believe it snowed. I'm just floored.

The boys played outside for a while in it. Z kept asking "What is this?" and then he kept calling it a ball. R was trying to catch snow flakes in his mouth and just had fun running around.

I have decided that I love snow like that. I love it and could probably put up with it for a while. It helps to know that the cold weather is going to produce something gorgeous in the end. It makes it all worth it. :)

An Insight to Me

I'm an overachiever and a perfectionist. I set these goals for myself and if I don't meet them, I beat myself up for a while.

So my unrealistic goals lately were 1. to make an A in Anatomy 2. To make all A's this semester in all 4 of my classes.

Now before kids this would have been a piece of cake so automatically I assume that I can do it with kids. Yeah I was wrong. I didn't do horribly in Anatomy, I got an 85, but dammit it's not my goal. I didn't meet my goal so I failed. I know it sounds stupid and petty, because an 85 is awesome for a hard class that people normally fail, but I am disappointed.

I know you're probably thinking "It's a B, what's the big deal?", right? It is a big deal. I have to get an A next semester otherwise I can't get into the nursing program. I NEED an A.

So I'm going to mope a bit, and then move on and know that I'll do better next semester. Crap, I just figured something out...if I wouldn't have had to miss 2 labs and something else, then I would have an A. Son of a bitch. Okay...I learned to not miss important things.

Anyhow, next semester I will do it and I will be fine. I will meet my goal of an A in Anatomy and I will get into the nursing program.